Being
Queer is More Than Genitals
Homosexual
was a SIN
Homosexual
was a disease
Homosexual
was a perverted sex act.
In
the 1970's we began to demand “homosexual” be considered a
person!
We
were not a “sin”, or a “disease”. We were more than a sex
act, we were a people. A tribe was being formed.
A
new culture was being built. We changed how we interacted, new
values embraced, new customs created. More importantly, now we had
communication with others. We were now a “tribe”. We could find
out what the New York queers were doing as well as the West Coast
queers. What had existed before in tiny pockets with regional
customs where now unified.
It
is safe to say homosexuals are the only minority that were routinely
raised by non-minorities. In most cases the young homosexual was
taught to hate or fear “those people”. It is a huge turning
point when a gay person finds that there ARE others. When we find we
are not alone. We are not freaks and that it is OK to be Gay!
Now
we had to learn what being “gay” was! In the early 1970's this
culture was being shaped and defined. Universal in that “normal”
people could also see what it was. This unfortunately caused a
backlash of hatred and anti gay bigotry that we had not seen for a
quarter of a century.
This
new culture did not have to be constrained by the old norms.
Relationships did not have to be based on one person “being the
man” and the other “being the woman”. We weren't allowed to
marry: do we have to be monogamous? How about “open relationships”,
maybe
“menage a trois”, even “polymorphic
relationships”. The whole spectrum of possibilities lay before us
in a wide array. In the middle of an explosion of sexual freedom, we
still knew we were more than sex. This was new territory for a people
who were supposedly defined by “sex”.
Let
me tell you about the moment when I discovered that being “queer”
was about more than how my genitals reacted.
After
graduating from college, I had discovered a church for people like
me! It was called the Metropolitan Community Church. In the mid
70's, they arraigned for a new film called “A Very Natural
Thing” to be shown as a fund raiser. Remember this was long
before VCR's and Cassettes. Now we had all seen what we referred to
as “training films”, (XXX film loops shown at “peep” shows).
We could even buy 8 mm silent films to show on our home projectors.
But this was different. It was not a “beat off” flick.
“A
Very Natural Thing” was a real movie with a story line. It
showed two gay men meeting and making a life together with everyday
problems. There was no need to “translate” it like we had to do
with every other film ever shown.
It
made such a powerful impact watching one lead say: “being with you,
I'm too excited to eat.” Then the other guy leaned in and together
they kissed. It was electrifying. I KNEW what they were feeling! I
knew what that kiss felt like.
Suddenly
it hit me this was the reason people loved watching movie kisses. It
had never caused a response in me. I had been watching screen kisses
for 24 years.
That
was the moment. It was then I realized that I was gay, that it was
more than just sex, it was a deeper part of me as a person. Even if I
never had sex again, I would still be gay.
This
film is also important in that it includes actual footage and
interviews shot at the 1973 Gay Pride/Christopher Street West parade.
It also has scenes filmed inside the Club Baths and the “Sanctuary”
disco. This was as “real life” as you could get. It even featured
full frontal male nudity! This was made 1974?
Today
it is easy to forget what the world was like when this film was made.
The Nixon – Watergate hearings, the Vietnam war, the civil rights
marches and now we were starting to have gay rights marches. The
whole fabric of our culture was changing.
Make
no mistake: a “queer culture” had existed before. Yet it was so
cloaked and hidden, few ever learned of it. Gay men in the early
1900's had few choices. They could resort to flamboyant mannerisms,
which lead to beatings, arrests, and in some cases death.
For
a good look at what that culture was like, watch “The Naked
Civil Servant” about Quentin Crisp, (as well as the sequel “An
Englishman in New York” which shows how deeply different that
culture and modern gay culture were).
Homosexuals
back then could remain celibate or marry a woman. This lead to untold
heartache and self destruction. About the only other course was to
keep very secretive. You could “drop hairpins”. This was the use
of certain words or terms. You had to be constantly aware of facial
reaction to them. Either they “got it” or had no idea what you
were talking about and ignored you.
“Dropping
hairpins” lasted well into the 1980's in many areas. For example:
asking if they were a “Friend of Dorthy”. Or if they knew any of
the “boys in the band”. Making references to the popular “diva's”
such as: Mae West, Sophie Tucker, on down to Cher and Madonna. Judy
Garland was perhaps one of the biggest touchstones in the “homosexual
heaven”.
When
we look back on this time, a great resource can be found in certain
movies. Advances in technology opened the door for a new type of
video entertainment. Just a few years previous, films cost huge
amounts of money. Even short 20 minute amateur endeavors cost the
equivalent of two or three high end luxury cars.
Then
with the advent of video tape in the 70's television networks found
they could afford to make TV movies and have the cost returned in
just a few showings. With the unbelievably quantum step of home
video players in the early 80's, for the first time the average
person could own a movie and watch it any time they wanted. Those
tapes and the evolution to DVDs allowed sales to return even more
profit while the costs plummeted for the independent
director/writers.
So
out of “made for TV movies” came the chance for video stories
that were written by, of, and for Gay people. Thus began “Gay
Cinema”. We no longer had to rely on what mainstream movie
accountants told us we had to view. We can now see ourselves, not
what the straight world told us we were supposed to be like.
Gay
leader Vito Russo pointed out in his pivotal classic “The
Celluloid Closet” the dangers we had faced. Up to the 1970's
nearly EVERY form of entertainment taught by example that a
homosexual needed to die. If not being killed by righteous “Justice”
then by suicide! These images were especially powerful because many
were hidden and subconsciously delivered. Thanks to his efforts and
his founding of GLAAD, we now have reliable presentations. Movies
are powerful tools. They can transport us into an understanding of
how and why we got to where we are.
For
example the films “Gay Sex in the 70's” and “How to
Survive a Plague” guide us through one of the most difficult
times our culture ever faced. Any major change like this causes fear
and problems. Mistakes were made and reversals happened. However
changes were moving ahead faster than many were comfortable with.
Now
we have a body of movies that reflect a true image of who we are and
how we got to be here. This, as opposed to great films like
“Jeffery”: Hollywood’s best effort to present a
sympathetic look at the AIDS crisis. A truly landmark film, yet for
all of its support, it was still what straight media thought that
“gays” were like. Gay Cinema is so important to maintain our
identity. Yet these movies are threatened by free downloads and
piracy.
Today
we see marriage equality expand. Along with the ability to adopt, to
live where we chose and have workplace protections, queer people are
being assimilated. While we have fought for this over the years, it
can take a great toll. It is no stretch of the imagination to
foresee a future with no gay bars, coffee houses or just places where
we can be around others of our tribe. Suddenly this new culture with
its new customs may disappear.
we
risk losing those hard fought protections as we cease to be
recognizable. We could discover ourselves back into a different kind
of closet where others could not find us.
So
please, whither you chose a documentary, a love story, or a comedy,
invest the time to watch a few of these movies. Ask yourself: How do
we maintain who we are in a time of blending in? If we can not pass
on that hard won sense of self – it will be lost forever.
A
short list of available Gay Cinema DVD's:
A
Very Natural Thing Drama
Parting
Glances One of the first
Aids Drama
Boys
Life: Three
short films: ”Pool Days”(1993), “A Friend of Dorothy”(1994),
“The Disco years”(1991)
A
Beautiful Thing
Coming
of age
Third
Man Out / by Ron Oliver (or
any of the Donald Strechy mysteries)
Were
the World Mine Musical
Shelter
Codependent Surfer movie
Breakfast
with Scot Comedy – ice
hockey
Big
Eden Comedy with C/W music set in the great northwest
Strapped
Avaunt guard - Existential
Latter
Days Love story, when
spirituality meets sexuality
Role/Play
Coming out/marriage equality
Straight
Jacket 50's Hollywood Comedy
The
Big Gay Musical On & off stage with the musical “Adam
and Steve”
Is
It Just Me? A modern gay Cyrano
Bear
City Diversity in diversity gets hairy, snappy dialogue
Any
of the “Eating
Out” comedy series
eCupid A
downloaded love app goes wrong
What
Happens Next? May - December
relationship over walking the dog
The
Men Next Door Discovering
you're dating a man as well as his son.
Judas
Kiss A gay take on
the old question of time travel
Hot
Guys with Guns Wanna
be private eyes
Wishmakers with
a gender-queer character
Documentaries
such as:
A
Naked Civil Servant
An
Englishman In New York
The
Laramie Project
Exposed:
the making of a Legend
The
Celluloid Closet
Sex
in the 70's
How
to Survive A Plague
Bridegroom
The
Times of Harvey Milk
Stonewall:
Uprising
Vito
My
Trip Down the Pink Carpet
Becoming
Chas
These
just scratch the surface of what is available in the gay movies.
There are also many more quality lesbian films as well as
transgender, etc. Truly now we have something for every interest. We
must support these resources or run the risk of losing them forever.
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